How I Meditate
Loryn, what kind of meditation do you do to calm your nerves and settle down?
There's two kinds of meditation I do mostly. One for more low level stress just to get back down to level head. This can be done in seconds or minutes or however long it needs. The other is for more intense stress, usually right before or after I feel like I’m gonna snap.
For low level stuff, I’m sure there are names for this process but I don’t know them off the top of my head but if you search mindfulness meditation you can find stuff similar. Whatever I’m doing I stop, close my eyes, put my hands in my lap or place them on my belly and breath deep. As I inhale through my nose I focus on the breath filling my lungs. If I’m hunched over I allow my breath to straighten my posture. As I exhale I allow myself to settle. If I am feeling tension I release it with my breath. If I am having thoughts that are uncomfortable I release them with my breath. I am not forcing anything, I am allowing for my natural breath. Right now there is nothing more important than breathing. I repeat this process until my posture is strong, my body is calm, and my mind is calm. This is the most important step, if this is all you do it is enough.
Depending on the situation I may then ask myself a series of questions. With a new perspective I remind myself what I was doing, what may have triggered me, what I was feeling. The questions themselves don’t matter as long its something in this ballpark; Is this important? Is this worth my time? Whatever your answers are then ask another series of questions; Am I solving the problem, or a symptom of the real problem? Will this create more problems in the future? Is this a permanent or temporary solution? Is there anything I can do about it? How much energy should I devote to this problem? These questions are designed to help you come to a decision about what you are going to do when you open your eyes. For small things like work stress it can be used to refocus your mind or assign priorities to tasks. For most things just breathing is good enough. For some you may already know what needs to be done, and if you still think that’s what needs to be done after you calm down, that’s probably what needs to be done. If its an interpersonal problem, most of the time talking to that person about it is the best solution.
The most important thing is this: breath deep, straighten your posture, accept your situation, come to a decision with a calm mind. It is important to note that this is not a process that delivers absolute truths. You can still make bad decisions, you can still make it worse. If that happens, learn from it, what assumptions did I make? Am I biased? Meditation and mindfulness doesn’t stop when you open your eyes, the goal is to recognize turmoil, and make being calm simply a choice you have to make. You cannot control the world around you, but you can control how you react to it.
—-
I do not recommend this, but this works for me
For high level stress, and I mean really high level. Fuck calm. Its time to break shit. Lash out. Its time to hurt. I will replace this pain with a pain I choose. I am not a product of my environment. My environment is a product of me. My focus will be laser precise. My decisions surgical. I will put myself right on the edge of what I can handle knowing that I can handle it. This not rage, it is spite. This is about catharsis.
For me the healthiest way that manifests (and it does manifest in other unhealthy ways which I will not discuss) is by physical training. My best training is done to spite the world. My actual routine is not important for the purposes of this but it consists of going 100% on the heavy bag, conditioning, and HIIT. I’m trying my hardest to rip that heavy bag off its chains (which happened once I had to replace it). Calm deep breathing is for later, right now I want fire in my lungs. I want to breath smoke. I want to burn the house down by the sheer friction of my muscle fibers. I want to ride that knife edge of exhaustion.
Then I rest. Flat on my back in a neutral position, palms up. In yoga this is called Shavasana, corpse pose, or Mrtasana, death pose. Metaphorically and literally this represents the end. The end of the fight, the end of all pain, the end of struggle. The only thing now is rest and peace. At this point I would begin my breath and mindfulness meditation.
—-
This is how I meditate. For obvious reasons I recommend the breath exercise. Its very beginner friendly, and works in most situations. You are always breathing, and therefore you can always meditate.